A TICKING OFF

tradesman
I thought all refrigerators, well at least all those manufactured in the last 5 years were self defrosting.
Don’t ask me how it works, I really don’t care to know. It’s like the internet and television I don’t have the foggiest idea how they work and have absolutely no interest in finding out. I’m happy just to turn them on and hey presto they do what they’re meant to do.
And so it is with the refrigerator…. That was until the beginning of summer. Since then I’ve been less than impressed with it’s performance, the interior light not working, freezing the salad greens but not freezing the ice cream and horror of horrors the inability to make ice!  No ice for the Vodka!!!! Something had to be done and done quickly.
So enter Pete, the local refrigeration technician, cute, friendly and possessing the most startling white teeth. The best smile I’ve seen in a long while.
After listening to my complaints and concerns, Pete turns his attention to the recalcitrant refrigerator.
I move away and leave Pete to do his thing. A few minutes have passed when Pete calls me to the kitchen.
“Nothing wrong with it mate.”
“Nothing wrong with it? But it’s not working!” I protest
“All you need to do is defrost it”
“Defrost! Doesn’t that happen automatically?”
“Look here”, says Pete opening the freezer compartment. “There is three inches of solid ice built up on the bottom. That throws everything out of whack. Get rid of that mess and she’ll be right.”
And as Pete tallies up the bill I’m given a further lecture on laziness and the need to maintain refrigerator cleanliness to keep it functioning at peak performance.
Handing me a bill I look at it and am appalled, $210.95 A handsome amount, by anyone’s standards just for telling me , I’m basically a slut.
No! I have used the word correctly. A slut is someone who doesn’t wash their hair, make their bed, do the dishes or as in my case, a person who doesn’t  defrost their refrigerator.
It shouldn’t be used to describe sexual promiscuity, although perhaps sluts do have a predisposition towards sexual misadventure. On that I couldn’t or perhaps, I’m not prepared to comment….
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